Trying Something New

I am getting out of my comfort zone this week.

I agreed to participate in a story telling event that will take place Friday and Saturday evenings (Feb 6 & 7) and I am nervous.

I have never done anything like this. I have taught workshops, done guest lectures, and readings from my books. In all of this I have a piece of paper in my hand, something to refer to in case I get lost. A crutch if you will.

A few (really) old friends will probably remember that I was on the speech team in high school. I did Humorous Interpretation and was pretty good. I also had what I was reading written down on paper and used it to perform.

This Friday and Saturday I will have none of it. It’s just me and my story.

Am I nervous? Of course. A few people have told me to just memorize my story, but that’s not how it works.

I am not an actor. I am not used to memorizing long pieces to recite back. I have directed a lot of actors over the years and I have so much respect for them. And I always told the actors that I worked with, “You don’t have to remember the words verbatim. You can change the words so that it sounds like something your character would really say. But you cannot change the intention. You still need to deliver the words so they work overall in the film.”

I am not memorizing anything. I am working to “learn the story”. To me, learning the story means that I don’t have to tell it the same each time, or for each performance. Depending on how I’m feeling I can take some liberties. As long as the overall feeling and intention of the story remains the same I can get through it just about any way I wish.

In my workshops and guest lectures I was giving the people who attended information. Information that I figured out over time, and is based on my experiences.

When I read the stories in my books I have the story in front of me, on paper. If I get lost, or lose my concentration, I have the story in front of me to get back on track.

On stage I will have nothing.

The good part is that I am telling a story I wrote. Even though I can’t have paper with me on stage to guide me if I get lost, I did write the story. Actually, I lived the story. One of the requirements for this storytelling performance is that the stories we tell, have to be true. And mine certainly is.

My story has both serious and humorous moments as good ones often have. I’m still figuring out the timing, thinking about where to look, and where to insert pauses.

I keep reading the story over and over, slowly moving from reading it, to telling it. I still have 5 more days to work on it.

I haven’t gotten up in front of people since before Covid, with the exception of the once a year class I teach at Pacific University. I have been teaching this same class for 13 years so I have that information down pretty well.

When Shay emailed me and asked if I wanted to do this, at first I hesitated. This is not something that is in my wheelhouse. I am nervous about getting up in front of friends, and complete strangers, to tell my story. Which is ultimately why I decided to do it.

Our rehearsals have been great. Shay has really worked with us to shape our stories and offer advice. The other storytellers are really good. I am so impressed with their stories and the way they tell them. I am looking forward to hearing all of them perform.

I know, I will be ready. This is not the sort of thing I would slack off on, or wait until the last minute to work on it. I have been steadily working towards this for the last few weeks. And it’s not like this is some big Broadway opening. It is an evening of stories in a small theatre. I believe there are 40 seats. But none of that matters, because I am going to approach this like it is a big deal. Because it is for me.

I have wanted to do something like this for a long time. Now is my chance and I’m going to work hard not to fuck it up. I want the people who attend to have a good time and hear good stories.

I may be nervous, but I’m looking forward to it. And if it goes well, maybe I’ll be asked to do it again.

If you’re in Portland and want to come out and support us, I’ll put the information below…

Thank you all for reading, subscribing, and supporting me and my writing and filmmaking.

Here is a clip of me reading Incident At Arrah Wanna, about the time I got busted for drugs when I was fourteen, at church camp. Yeah, I have never been a role model...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QLEjFvSeh_A

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